{ugly women}

i read a blog post this week called {the inevitable ugliness of women}.  it's an amazing post.  so much better than i could ever write.  so much better than i will be able to tell you.  please please read it and then come on back over here.  i'll wait....

i'll be honest i started reading this and had my back up.  i read something that made me think that i was going to hate it.  i found it, possibly like you, through a blog.  the blogger was giving her take on it.  i'm glad i popped over to read it because i took it in such a different way.

"Do you remember? When you were beautiful? And then? … You weren’t. How did that happen? When?"

that line.  that one right there.  grabbed me.  it grabbed me and didn't let go.  i don't remember.  but it did happen just like that.  i was young and carefree and beautiful and then, i wasn't.  all i could see were those extra pounds.  the stretch marks.  the wrinkles.  the freckles.  and now, the grey hair.  

"Ladies. We know you know you’re beautiful. We know you know that it doesn’t really matter."

and that line.  it's true.  i know i'm beautiful.  but i don't always feel beautiful.  i know it doesn't matter and still i compare myself to others as if it does.  

i'm slowly feeling beautiful again.  i'm getting older and as i get older i'm appreciating my body more.  those extra pounds, they are from the four beautiful children i have {and let's be honest, my love of butter}.  the stretch marks?  the same {well minus the butter}.  the wrinkles, are my wisdom.  my freckles, make me unique.  my grey hair, years of living.

"There will come a day when my daughter will feel ugly for the rest of her life."

then there's that line.  i hate that line.  i hate the nasty disgusting part truth of that line.  i think that line is only partially true because i hope someday that my daughters will feel beautiful again.  someday when they truly don't care what people see and they see only what i see.  i'm not ignorant in thinking that they will never feel these feelings that women feel.  i know they will.  and i'll be right here to tell them that i felt them too.  and that hopefully, they will go away.  because they are beautiful.  we are all beautiful.

something that bothered me about the post was the thoughts in the back of my head "don't boys feel this way?"  men must have moments of self doubt?  moments of feeling uglier than the guy next to them?  don't men have days when nothing they own looks right on them?  if they don't, then i'm both jealous and truly happy for my boys that they won't have to deal with it.

what do you think?  do women as a whole feel ugly?  and what if  anything can we do about it?


  1. Thanks for reading the whole thing and reframing it. I thought Jessica highlighted the brutality of that one harsh line with an emphasis that neglected the post's primary thrust.

  2. @BHJ

    i agree. possibly she didn't read the whole thing or read it at all. but i definitely went to it thinking that it was going to be ugly and disgusting but in reality it was beautiful. thank you for putting into words what so many of us can not.